How to Fix a Professional Relationship

“Most of the time, when you’ve got a problem in your life, it’s at least partially your fault.”

I’ve made my share of mistakes in leadership. One of the biggest lessons I learned came during my time at Marriott. I was up for a big promotion, but when the regional vice presidents were polled, five supported me. Four didn’t. By pure chance, I saw the list and learned who those four were. I knew why. I had a reputation for being aggressive, too pushy, and always on top of people. At the time, I thought that was just being responsible. The reality? It was also annoying.

Instead of getting defensive or quitting, I decided to change. I approached those relationships differently. Less pressure and more empathy. I focused on understanding their style and adjusting mine to meet it. I stopped trying to “wear people down” to get things done and started teaching, guiding, and helping them succeed.

It didn’t happen overnight, but over time, it worked. I became a better leader. When I eventually left Marriott for Disney, my career took off. The truth is, people have long memories. Changing your behavior doesn’t always erase your past, but it does open the door to new opportunities and a fresh start.

If you’ve damaged a professional relationship, don’t let pride get in the way. Step back, assess what’s not working, and ask yourself honestly, “Is it me?” Then adjust, listen, and adapt. When you change how you act, you change who you are, and that’s the first step toward repairing trust.